


Indications of an All-Encompassing Plot

by stillskies



Category: Hikaru no Go
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-04
Updated: 2012-03-04
Packaged: 2017-11-01 03:20:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/351392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stillskies/pseuds/stillskies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Akari is getting married.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Indications of an All-Encompassing Plot

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for round 7 of [Blind Go](http://blind-go.livejournal.com/).

The invitation is addressed to _Mr. and Mrs. Touya Akira_.

It takes a few minutes of _staring_ at it for him to truly process it, and when he does, he throws it across the room and picks up his cell phone, quickly dialing Akari’s number.

“This is Fujisaki,” she chirps pleasantly, but Hikaru can sense the underlying amusement.

“I am _not_ Touya’s _wife!_ ” he says shrilly into the phone.

There is laughter on the other end of the line for a minute – he watches the seconds tick off on the call timer as she whoops and hollers – before she composes herself and replies, “I see you got the invitation, Hikaru.”

“Yes,” he replies, digging through the corner he threw it in. Damn. He’d have to clean this place before Touya got back today from Okinawa. “What’s it for?”

Silence. “You didn’t _open_ it?”

 _Ah-ha! Found it!_ “No. I was distracted by you implying Touya and I are married.”

Akari sighs on the other end of the line. “It’s for my _wedding_ , Hikaru. I told you I’d be sending them.”

Hikaru thinks back on the last few conversations he’s had with Akari but comes up blank. “I don’t remember.”

“You do remember that I’m getting married, don’t you?”

“You threatened to put me in a pink cummerbund,” he replies, shuddering. “I remember.”

“Good,” Akari says. “Make sure you send in the RSVP for you and Touya-san. I need them for the caterer.”

“Can’t I just tell you that we’ll be there?”

“You’d _better_ be there, Shindou Hikaru,” she says menacingly. “I would be _very upset_ if you didn’t show.”

“There, you know we’re coming. I don’t have to send the RSVP thing, right?”

Akari hangs up on him and Hikaru stares at the phone in annoyance. “Whatever,” he says to the empty room, placing the invitation on a clean area of the counter and picking up stray dishes – Touya will be home in a few hours. 

He goes back into the living room and starts searching the floor where he dropped his phone. He eyes the half full boxes of Chinese on the floor and hopes he didn’t drop it in the Mu Shu again – he’d had to get a new phone after the sauce had fried his SIM card.

+++

“No, Mother,” Hikaru says into the phone for the twentieth time. “I am not planning on ruining Akari’s wedding!” He sighs in exasperation and Touya glares at him as he takes an empty pizza box out of the couch cushions. _Damn. Knew I forgot something_. “Look, I’ve gotta go. I’ll stop by this weekend.” He listens as his mother sighs and generally does her best at putting him through a full-on guilt trip before she agrees and hangs up.

“Shindou,” Touya says, “why is there a half-eaten Thai box under the sink?”

 _Shit. Forgot that one, too_. “I don’t know?” he tries, knowing full well that it isn’t going to work.

“Can I not leave for a few days without you utterly trashing the place?” Touya sighs in exasperation.

Hikaru tosses his head back and stares at the ceiling. _Is today National Sigh A Lot Day? Seriously?_ “Come on, Touya,” he says cheerfully. “Look at it this way: You can see the floor!”

He barely manages to duck the empty soda can that Touya hurls at his head.

+++

Waya is already sitting at the table when he gets there. Hikaru grabs Waya’s soda and takes a sip through the straw. Waya grimaces.

“Can’t you get your own drink?” Waya asks, taking the soda back and staring at the straw in dismay.

Hikaru shrugs. “Yours was right there.”

Waya chucks a fry at his head which Hikaru dodges easily. “So, what’s up?”

“I got Akari’s invitation today,” Hikaru begins, stealing a few fries from Waya’s napkin. Waya glares and pulls the napkin closer to himself. “It was addressed to _Mr. and Mrs. Touya Akira_.” Hikaru grimaces.

“You guys are practically married, anyway, so what’s the big deal?”

Hikaru stares at him in shock. “ _I’m_ the dominant one, damn it!”

Waya snickers. “Really?”

“ _YES_.”

“So, the last time I was over there, you were doing the dishes because you _wanted_ to?”

Hikaru thinks back to the last time Waya had _actually_ been over. Touya had been out of town for a week – another Go convention – and was due home that night. “Yes.”

“Bullshit. You _hate_ doing dishes. Fujisaki used to come over and do them when we lived together.”

“And Oka-chan comes over and does them now that I live with Touya,” Hikaru argues. “But she had a game the next morning.”

“And so you did them so that your husband wouldn’t be upset?”

“Have you ever seen Touya in a snit?” he asks before realizing what Waya said. “ _Damn it, Waya_ , I’m not his damn _wife!_ ”

He gets up and begins stalking away, leaving Waya laughing hysterically in the booth.

“Hey!” he hears Waya call. “I thought we were going to the arcade?”

Hikaru turns around and glares. “I’m going home.”

“Come on. I’ve been looking forward to kicking your ass all week,” Waya argues. “You can’t bail out now just because you were the only one who didn’t know you were Touya’s wife.”

“Oh god. Will you _just shut up?_ ”

Waya snickers. “Come on. I’ll even let you pick the first game.”

Hikaru eyes him suspiciously. “You don’t wanna go home, huh?”

“Le-Ping is visiting.”

“Ah,” Hikaru says knowingly. “I’ll kick your ass and make you forget _all_ about it.”

+++

“You’re late, Hikaru,” Akari snaps. “You were supposed to be here twenty minutes ago!”

Mitani is standing off to the side, looking very grateful that the attention is no longer on him.

“I had a game,” Hikaru replies defensively. “I _told_ you I was probably going to be late.”

“You said _five minutes_ , Hikaru. That was _fifteen minutes ago_.”

“Now, now, Akari,” Fujisaki-san says quietly. “You have to remember how tough this must be on Hikaru-kun.” She looks at him with tears in her eyes. “After all, you’re getting married.”

Akari rolls her eyes. Mitani’s coughs sound suspiciously like snickers. Tsuda is standing off to the side, looking around uncertainly.

“Anyway,” Akari says, “we’re here to discuss the details of the ceremony.”

Fujisaki-san is looking at Hikaru with sad eyes. 

“Is it going to be traditional?” Tsuda asks.

“We’re going to incorporate some Western elements,” Akari is explaining. “Yuki and I are wearing the traditional clothes, but I’m not painting myself white.”

“Good,” Hikaru says, doing his best to _not_ look at Akari’s mom, which is getting increasingly harder seeing as she _is still staring_. “You’d look like a ghost.”

“Hikaru,” Akari growls. 

“What?” he asks innocently. “I saw my mom’s wedding photos.” In great detail, he wants to add. Ever since she heard about Akari, she’s been calling him _every single day_ to talk. 

“The kimono will be white,” Akari continues, ignoring him. “Kumiko-chan, do you want to wear a kimono or a dress? Hikaru will wear a hakama.”

“Don’t I get a choice?” Hikaru whines. The last time he wore hakama, Touya had laughed so hard he couldn’t get off the floor.

“No,” Akari snaps. “You will wear what I tell you to wear.”

Mitani shakes his head. “She told me the same thing,” he admits begrudgingly. “I wanted to wear a suit.”

Hikaru nods sympathetically. He’s imagining Touya planning their wedding, now, and immediately stops, because, oh god, he _does not need_ to be thinking about this. He glares at Akari.

Fujisaki-san comes over and stands next to him. Mitani excuses himself and Hikaru wants to strangle him.

“It’s okay,” Fujisaki-san is saying quietly. “You’ll find someone new, Hikaru-kun.”

His smile is a bit strained by the end of the night, which is the next chance he has to talk to Akari, who has been pointedly ignoring him _all freaking evening_.

“What did you tell your mother?” he demands.

“Nothing,” she replies.

“Then why does she think _I’m in love with you?_ ” He’s aware he sounds a bit hysterical. He’s also aware that, after a night of Fujisaki-san telling him about all the single young women he’ll meet at the wedding, he just. Doesn’t. Care.

“She’s thought that since middle school. You always came over and tutored me in Go, remember?”

He’s trying to figure out the logic, but is having no luck. “So? Just because I tutored you in Go means I’m madly in love with you?”

“Of course not,” she says crossly. “I’m not Touya-san.”

“Are you still mad about that?” 

“Oh, Hikaru,” she sighs dramatically. “The world isn’t about you.” She pauses and smiles. “It’s about you in a lilac hakama.”

And with that, she turns and leaves.

+++

“ _Lilac_ ,” he repeats for the hundredth time since he got home. “Who does she think I am? _You?_ ”

“I beg your pardon?” Touya says, raising an eyebrow.

Hikaru eyes the lilac and silver shirt Touya’s wearing. “I rest my case.”

Touya rolls his eyes. “It’s her wedding, Shindou.”

“Doesn’t mean she has to dress me like a colorblind idiot.”

“There is nothing wrong with lilac,” Touya insists.

“I wouldn’t make her wear something like that at my wedding.”

“You’re getting married?” Touya asks. “That’s the first I’ve heard about this.”

Hikaru flushes. “I meant _if_ I got married. _If_.”

“Mhm.”

“Which isn’t happening because, well, not legal. Besides, we have a pretty nice set up now, and I’m sleeping on the couch if I keep talking, huh?”

Touya nods.

“Got it.”

+++

His mom is waiting for him at the front door when he gets there, which just doesn’t bode well. Touya is walking next to him, spine straight and mouth set.

“I told you that you didn’t have to come,” Hikaru whispers.

“And _I_ told _you_ that I would,” Touya replies. “Besides, she already knows.”

“No, she doesn’t.”

“She sent me that card last New Year’s.”

Hikaru looks at him blankly.

“To my dear _son-in-law_.”

Hikaru falters. “Oh god. You’re right. She _knows_.”

Touya sighs wearily.

They’re at the door now, and Hikaru’s mom is leading them inside. Hikaru suddenly realizes that Touya has his _own_ pair of house slippers. And Hikaru has his own at Touya-san’s house.

Actually, Akiko-san bought him a _futon_ last year. 

And lays it out next to Touya’s whenever they stay the night.

“Do your parents know, Touya?” he asks suddenly.

Hikaru’s mom and Touya stop walking.

“Yes,” Touya says simply, in that tone of voice that makes Hikaru feel like an idiot for missing something so obvious.

“Oh god.”

“Whatever are you talking about, Hikaru?” his mom asks.

“Mom,” Hikaru says seriously. “Do you know?”

His mother sighs. “Know _what_ , Hikaru?”

“About Touya and me.”

“Of course,” she replies. “It’s not like you were subtle about it. I figured you _wanted_ me to know.” 

“How long?” he demands.

“About four years, I suppose?”

Four years. _Four years_. “But we haven’t been together that long!” Hikaru says shrilly.

“Really?” She frowns. “Are you sure you just didn’t forget?” She looks at Touya apologetically. “I apologize for my hare-brained child.”

“There is no need to apologize, Shindou-san,” Touya says calmly.

“Please, call me Mitsuko,” she tells him.

Touya is turning pink. _Pink_. He can’t even _flush_ correctly, Hikaru thinks wildly.

“Thank you, Mitsuko-san,” Touya says quietly.

“I’ll be right back,” Hikaru announces, and leaves.

+++

Akari answers the door with an exasperated expression. 

“This is all your fault,” Hikaru heaves. 

She sighs. “ _What_ is all my fault, Hikaru?”

“This… this _wedding_.”

“How is my wedding at fault?”

“ _My mom knows_.”

“You’re making no sense,” she informs him. “By the way, I still haven’t received your RSVP.”

“ _I’m in the wedding!_ ”

She shrugs and shuts the door.

He is still staring at the closed door when Fujisaki-san finds him. 

“Oh,” he says. “I was just… Sorry. Akari. Um. We RSVP,” he continues lamely.

“You poor dear,” Fujisaki-san murmurs as she walks past him.

Hikaru shakes his head and leaves.

+++

“Where in the world did you take off to, Hikaru?” his mom is standing next to Touya, who is sitting at the table. There are open magazines and a notebook lying on the table. Touya has a pen in his hand.

“What. Are. You. Doing?” he asks. The magazines are thick. There’s only two types of magazines he knows of that are that thick, and neither his mother nor Touya read manga.

“Nothing,” Touya replies calmly. He places the pen down. “Anyway, I have a student in an hour, so I’ll be leaving first.” He picks up the notebook. “Thank you, Mitsuko-san. I shall think about it.”

Hikaru’s mother smiles and gathers the magazines. Hikaru can see the side of one: _Asian Bride Magazine_.

“Please come again, Akira-kun,” his mother is saying. 

“ _Akira_ -kun?” Hikaru repeats. “ _I_ don’t even call him that!”

“Oh, Hikaru. You’re overreacting,” she tells him. “Sit down. I’ll make you something to eat.”

“Food doesn’t solve everything, Mom,” Hikaru complains, but sits down anyway. 

She smiles knowingly. “Of course not. Is ramen all right? I’ve not been shopping this week.”

Hikaru just nods and stares at the stack of magazines in front of him.

+++

“Shindou,” Touya is yelling, “get _up_.”

Hikaru pulls the blanket over his face in response and curls into a ball. Maybe Touya won’t notice him.

He is suddenly looking at a very irate Touya, who is half dressed in a suit – lavender – and staring at him with narrowed eyes. “Did you not hear me, Shindou?”

“I heard you,” Hikaru mumbles, rolling onto his other side. “Five more minutes, ‘kay?”

“Fujisaki-san will not be in the best of moods if you are _late_ to her _wedding_.”

Hikaru winces. “Why does everyone always act like I’m late all the time?” he complains, sitting up and running a hand through his hair. 

“Because you _are_ ,” Touya replies from the bathroom. “You were even late to the rehearsal dinner last night.”

 _Ugh_ , Hikaru thinks. The whole night was spent dodging Fujisaki-san, who kept staring at him with sad eyes and telling him how she’ll definitely be sure to introduce him to Akari’s cousin.

Hikaru has seen Akari’s cousin. Touya – in his pastel suits and girly haircut – looks better. _Way_ better.

“It wasn’t my fault,” he calls back, rolling out of bed. “I missed the train.”

“Because you were reading _Jump_ , even though I _told_ you that you were going to be late if you didn’t leave right then.”

“How was I supposed to stop? Ulquiorra was about to kill Ichigo. I had to find out what happened,” Hikaru argues, walking into the bathroom and grabbing his toothbrush. “You’re the same way with kifu.”

“Yes,” Touya agrees, staring intently into the mirror as he parted his hair. “But I also know that I can take it on the train and study. That way I’m not _late_.”

Hikaru sticks his tongue out at Touya and brushes his teeth. Touya sighs and starts the shower while Hikaru finishes. He rinses his mouth out, gives Touya a quick morning kiss – Touya refuses to kiss him until Hikaru brushes his teeth – and hops in the shower.

+++

Hikaru is standing outside of the temple. Touya is straightening out Hikaru’s hakama, and Hikaru fidgets. 

“It’s fine, Touya,” he says, agitated. “It’s not like it has to be perfect.”

“Actually, it does,” Touya replies dryly. He tugs on Hikaru’s sleeve and smiles. “There.”

Hikaru looks at the temple. Fujisaki-san is waiting outside. 

“Oh god. Please don’t make me do this.”

“Fujisaki-san will destroy you if you don’t show up. Mitani-san will destroy what’s left for upsetting Fujisaki-san,” Touya replies logically. “I’m sure it won’t be that bad, Shindou. I’ll see you at the reception.”

“What?” Hikaru stares at Touya, wide-eyed. “You mean you’re not going _with_ me?”

Touya sighs. “No,” he says patiently. “The ceremony is closed to family only.”

“But,” Hikaru tries. “Don’t I get a date?”

Touya shakes his head in exasperation. “To the _reception_. Fujisaki-san explained this yesterday, remember?”

He vaguely recalls Akari talking about the ceremony, but he had been too busy squirming under Fujisaki-san’s gaze to pay attention. “Right.”

“You don’t remember.”

“Not a word.”

+++

The ceremony is about as enjoyable as a root canal – an experience Hikaru had the pleasure of undergoing last summer – and takes about as long. 

Akari’s cousin, Rie, is staring at Hikaru with what he assumes are supposed to be seductive eyes, but make her look like she’s constipated rather than sexy. What’s making it worse, though, is Fujisaki-san’s encouraging glances. 

The priest is droning on and on, and Mitani throws a glance his way. Hikaru gives him a pained one in return. Mitani grins. 

Akari shoots them a dark look, and Mitani looks dutifully back at the priest. Hikaru mouths _sorry_.

+++

Touya is waiting for him at the table – Akari made sure to seat Touya and Tsuda’s date at the head table so that they didn’t feel out of place – when they walk in. Akari and Mitani are quickly swarmed, so Hikaru figures that it’s safe to make his escape.

He is two feet from Touya when Fujisaki-san and Rie pop out of nowhere.

“Aah!” Hikaru shrieks, putting a hand to his chest and taking a step back. 

“I’m sorry,” Fujisaki-san apologizes sweetly. “Did we startle you?”

Yes, he wants to say, but smiles and shakes his head. He can see Touya watching him from over Rie’s head. “Not at all,” he says. His rapidly beating heart calls him a liar, but then, it also keeps telling him that the amount of starch and carbohydrates he consumes is going to kill him.

“I just wanted to introduce you to my niece, Fujisaki Rie,” she says. Rie smiles coyly, but it comes off as more of a grimace.

“It’s great to see you again,” Hikaru says, bowing politely. 

“It’s been a while, Shindou-kun,” Rie replies quietly. Her voice sounds like sandpaper on gravel. 

“It has.” 

“Well,” Fujisaki-san cuts in, beaming. “I’ll leave you two to get reacquainted.”

He watches her walk away. Rie stands firmly in his path to Touya, who is watching him and trying not to laugh. He’s failing.

Hikaru sighs. “Look,” he says quickly. “I’m seeing someone.”

Rie’s face falls. “But, Auntie said that you were getting over Akari.”

“No,” Hikaru replies flatly. 

“Oh,” she says. 

“Yeah.” He stands there, expecting her to _move_ , but she just _keeps standing there_. “I’m kinda trying to get to my date, so.”

“Oh!” she replies, turning pink. “I’m sorry.” She steps to the side, and Hikaru makes a beeline to Touya.

“An acquaintance?” Touya asks as soon as he sits down.

“Fujisaki-san tried to _set me up_ ,” Hikaru hisses. “And I think Akari is plotting something.”

Touya frowns. “Why?”

“She said something about a bouquet and not letting it touch the ground,” he explains. “What the hell does a bouquet have to do with anything?”

Touya is grinning. “You really don’t know?”

“No!”

Akari is suddenly there and pulling Touya away. Hikaru watches as she tells Touya something, and Touya is grinning like an idiot, and Hikaru has a _very bad feeling_.

They come back to the table after a minute of hushed whispering, and Mitani joins them. He shakes his head at Hikaru and completely ignores Touya, who doesn’t seem to mind. Hikaru has a second to wonder if it’s a bad sign that Touya is used to his friends – well, Mitani isn’t exactly a _friend_ , but he’s more than an acquaintance, especially since he is now married to Hikaru’s best friend – ignoring him.

“Hikaru,” Akari says, smiling sweetly, which just doesn’t bode well. “Remember. That bouquet touches the floor, and I’ll kill you.” 

Hikaru shudders and nods. “Got it.”

Akari goes back to mingling, and Hikaru turns to Mitani. “What’s the deal with the bouquet?”

Mitani shrugs, looking uncomfortable. “Western tradition,” he says shortly and follows after his wife.

Hikaru turns back to Touya. “Touya?”

“It’s nothing, Shindou,” Touya reassures him. “It’s just bad luck for the bouquet to hit the ground. That’s all.”

He can sense that there is something Touya isn’t telling him, but figures that arguing about it isn’t the wisest option, so he lets the subject drop.

“Attention!” Akari’s voice booms through the reception hall. “It’s time for the bouquet toss!”

He’s pretty sure it’s his imagination, but he swears that the _entire female population of the room_ has turned to look at him. He blinks and shakes his head.

“Hikaru?” Akari is looking straight at him, so Hikaru quickly stands and rushes to the group.

Which is comprised entirely of females.

All of whom are staring at him.

He eyes them warily and decides that it’s probably safe to stand on the outskirts. He’s sure they all know the custom and won’t let the flowers fall, which is good. He is rather fond of breathing.

Akari is smiling at them, and suddenly there is no one standing next to him. Instead, they seem to have formed a circle _around_ him. 

Hikaru looks around, panicking.

“All right!” Akari chirps happily and turns around, her back facing them. 

Suddenly, the bouquet is sailing in the air. It’s half a meter to his right, going straight toward a girl that he vaguely recognizes from Akari’s engagement party. 

_Catch it_ , he thinks. _She has to catch it._

The girl steps away.

The bouquet continues to fall.

Akari is _looking right at him._

“Damn it,” Hikaru hisses and dives, catching it a few inches from the floor.

The _entire room_ erupts into applause. The girls nearest to him congratulate him.

Akari is suddenly throwing her hands around him and hugging him. “You’ll have to tell me when the wedding is,” she says against his ear.

“What?” Hikaru says, confused. “Whose wedding?”

“Yours, silly,” she says as she pulls away. “After all, you caught the bouquet.”

“ _What?!_ ”

Touya is standing off to the side, laughing into his hand.

Hikaru stalks over to him and waves the bouquet in Touya’s face. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he hisses.

“Don’t worry about it, Shindou,” Touya tells him. “No one is forcing you to marry me if you don’t wish to.”

Hikaru sighs in relief.

“Though, I’m sure my father will ask you about it in a year or two.”

Hikaru pales.

+++

The bouquet is sitting on their mantle at home, a constant reminder that the world at large hates him. Touya has been pausing to look pointedly at it for the last two weeks, and Hikaru has spent that time squirming.

He’s lost two games – one of them was to Waya, for god’s sake – since getting that damned bunch of flowers. He’s tried to tell Touya that they’re cursed, but his good-for-nothing significant other won’t see reason.

“They’re pretty,” Touya says whenever he brings them up.

 _Pretty, my ass_ , Hikaru thinks, staring at the bouquet.

He hears Touya sigh. “They’re _not_ cursed, Shindou, and yes, I would notice if they disappeared.”

Hikaru continues to sulk.

He is doing just that, actually, when the doorbell rings. Hikaru frowns – Oka-chan isn’t supposed to be over until later – and goes to answer the door.

“Good afternoon, Hikaru!” Akari chirrups happily, breezing past him, a large bag in her hand.

“When did you get home?” he asks. “And why are you _here_?

“Good afternoon, Mitani-san,” Touya says politely. “Would you like some tea?”

“Please,” she replies, smiling at Touya before holding out the bag to Hikaru, who tentatively takes it.

“What’s in it?”

“Just a few books. I got them in New York when Yuki and I were there on our honeymoon,” she explains. “I also brought pictures.”

He starts cautiously pulling things out of the bag, trying to decipher the words on the covers.

_Go! More Than A Game_

_Go: The World’s Most Fascinating Game_

_A Scientific Introduction To Go_

“Cool,” Hikaru says, placing them on the coffee table and reaching for the last book in the bag.

_The Complete Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings_

“My English isn’t that great,” Hikaru says slowly. “I think I’m reading this wrong.”

“ _The Complete Guide to Gay and Lesbian Weddings_ ,” Touya reads helpfully. “Thank you very much, Mitani-san.”

“Why did you bring us a wedding planning book, Akari?” Hikaru asks, though he’s pretty sure he knows what the answer is, and it’s probably better to just let it be.

Akari smiles and looks at the bouquet on the mantle. “So that you’ll have something to keep your notes in.” She looks to Touya and continues, “It’s very helpful.”

“We definitely appreciate it,” Touya is saying. “Shindou is so disorganized.”

“And always late,” Akari commiserates. “I don’t know _how_ you put up with it.”

Hikaru blinks. “We’re not getting married.”

“Yet,” Akari adds.

Hikaru glares at the bouquet. 

_Cursed._


End file.
